Memories
by Estrelle Buscador
Summary: Years ago, Brainy helped the girl he loved get together with the boy of her dreams, and now he is attending the wedding. He remembers the times they all shared together. Does he have any regrets? One shot.


This is my first fanfic, Hey Arnold! or otherwise. I hope you enjoy it and please please please let me know what you think! :)

Disclaimer: I don't own Hey Arnold! or any of its characters. I am just a rabid fan!

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I sat down in a pew near the back of the church, and stuck my hand into the paper bag I had brought. I let the grains of rice spill through my fingers like sand through an hourglass. Time. It was a thing especially present on my mind today.

Time was a funny thing, to be sure. Looking back on my twenty-six years, I could see my career, my college life, and my childhood rushing by in a speedy but effortless way; but the one hour before the wedding crept by and every second seemed to take a moment to catch its breath before passing by. I took the time to look around the church, at the pianist and the vocalist running through their scales and at the pink roses, so reminiscent of the bride's favorite childhood color, tied to the ends of the pews. I chuckled slightly; it seemed incongruous that the most tomboyish of girls so loved the girliest of colors. Well, not that incongruous if you knew her as well as I do. That was the color that brought her and her future husband together for the first time. And, it was the color she wore the first day I saw her, the day I fell in love with her.

At least as much as one could fall in love when you were in preschool. But that seemed to be the best time to do so, I thought. It was a pure, child-like love and admiration untainted by lust or ulterior motives. But I was in love with her the minute I saw her – small, muddy, a bit of the little-girl-lost about her, but with a spark of light and joy in her eyes that seemed new. It made my heart leap when I thought she was looking at me like that, but then it fell when I realized that her gaze rested on the new boy – the boy with the oddly shaped head. The disappointment hadn't been enough to deter me from following her around like a lost puppy – which had led to the first of many backhand blows. I was too shocked to yell or cry, simply rubbed the bridge of my nose and presented the broken lenses to the confused teacher. It had been when she had been pulling out a roll of masking tape to repair them that I had heard the laughter and turned around to see the girl looking upset and embarrassed at the laughing children. Fury had then jumped into her face and she had sprung against the mockers, brandishing her fists.

And that had set the standard for the next several years. She had ruled the old crowd with a sharp tongue and furious fists – and that was the only side that most of our childhood friends had ever seen. Her façade hadn't fooled everyone, though. Her best friend, Phoebe, had obviously seen past it, and Arnold – well, he was Arnold the optimist, and he could see better than most the best parts of others. So perceptive, yet it took him forever, to see what I'd always seen. And me, of course. I saw more of her than anyone. Her sorrows, her instances of compassion, and her joys. And of course, her long-held, passionate love for Arnold.

It would have been hard to miss that, seeing her as often as I did, not to see the love smoldering beneath her fiery façade. Common sense would have told me to stop watching her after she broke my glasses for the twentieth time. But I was a young boy in love, and common sense be dashed! My hand snuck up to my face and subconsciously rubbed the bridge of my nose, although there were no longer glasses there to shield. That had changed our senior year of high school; Mom finally bit the bullet and let me buy contacts, probably causing the optometrist to go into mourning at the loss of such a steady source of income.

At that point, the change seemed superfluous; Helga and I had become friends our freshman year. Some idiot of a senior who had no idea of who he was messing with had tried to steal her backpack. No real challenge for Helga, but in the struggle her favorite ribbon had been torn, and the pieces had fallen in the ground. She stared in shock at them, the senior had snorted in laughter, and I sprang into action. Helga is a fighter, I am not. I got decked, and Helga quickly flew into battle. Next I knew, the senior was running away and Helga was handing me the broken halves of my glasses – for once _not_ broken by her – and was helping me up. "That was stupid, Brainy! You're smart, but you can't punch to save your life." She smiled, "But thanks."

And just like that, we were friends. We hung out, ate at the same table during lunch, and just talked. Somehow, the fact that I had basically stalked her for most of our lives never came up. Besides Phoebe, I became one of the few people that Helga ever really opened up to, especially when Phoebe and Gerald conceded to the inevitable and started dating. I still remember the first talk that Helga and I had had after the announcement.

She hugged her knees, resting her chin on her arms. "I'm glad for 'em, really. Phebes is happy with Tall Hair Boy, and he likes me now, too. Ever since the whole…Save-the-Neighborhood thing." She waved her hand through the air. "It's just, it reminds me that I'm still alone – you know what I mean, Brainy," she added apologetically, "and especially since it's Tall Hair Boy…he just makes me think of Arnold."

I rubbed the back of my neck. Helga had told me about helping to save the neighborhood and – under threat of a backhand blow should I ever reveal it – her kiss with Arnold. It was laughable in a way; I had seen so many of her heartfelt confessions of love, yet I actually missed _the_ Confession. True, that would have involved getting past all the guards, and figuring out that the girl I loved suddenly was much taller and had a deep voice; still, where was I? And yet, I think I saw a lot more than those actually present did.

"I kept asking him to hold me, and he kept backing away…he seemed so shocked and horrified. And then at the end, he asked me if I really meant it or if I hated him. And like a fool, I told him I hated him, of course! I went away, and I was so happy that my secret was safe. But afterwards," she buried her face in her arms, "I realized what it all meant – he can't stand me!"

I had ventured a hand onto her shoulder and patted it in a comforting way. "I don't think that's true." Of course, it wasn't! For all the spectrum of emotions she herself possessed, she had a distinct inability to read others' properly – especially Arnold's. She was fiery and impulsive, he was cool and reflective. No matter how strong his feelings were for her, he couldn't profess them in the way she did; he would need time to contemplate and process them before making a decision. He "needed to lie down?" No doubt! But all the same, he didn't push her away, he didn't begin to gently let her down as he would have if he didn't reciprocate. He was starting to love her, of that I was certain. That would explain the long looks he gave her after the Save-the-Neighborhood adventure, the pensive half smiles aimed at her, and the more frequent reaching out to her. Helga, though, saw the latter as expressions of pity, and built the wall around herself even thicker. She didn't allow herself to see what was happening, and Arnold was forced to back off a little.

It got to the point where Phoebe, Gerald, and I were getting tired of it. It was obvious that both cared for each other, but they were keeping themselves apart – Helga, for fear of rejection, and Arnold for fear of hurting Helga (and probably loss of limb). So we set up a set-up.

Phoebe and I dragged Helga to the park to help Phoebe with a botany project, one she was hoping to use to apply for a lucrative scholarship to the college she hoped to attend. All three of us were standing in the lake, our shirt sleeves rolled up past our elbows, and our hands gripped the reeds that Phoebe needed for the experiment. After being pulled, the reeds had to be submerged in a solution of water, plant food, and some sort of chemical for about half an hour. Gerald and Arnold walked up right before we pulled them; they had apparently been discussing the line-up of their baseball game the next Saturday, and "just happened" to run into us. I had to cough a bit at that. Helga definitely wanted to bolt, and for a second she almost did. But it had taken us over an hour to find the reeds, longer even than Phoebe and I had anticipated, and she wouldn't let Phoebe down. So she stayed. Just when we began to pull out the reeds, I slipped and fell onto the muddy bank, the reeds in my hand. I looked down at my muddy clothes and swore. "Sorry Phebes, but I have to run home. These are my best clothes, and I really don't want to explain to Mom why I'd need to get new ones. Hey, Arnold! Could you please grab these reeds? I need to get home and change now."

And Arnold, being Arnold, not only grabbed the reeds immediately, but helped me out of the lake so I wouldn't slip with a look of concern on his face. "Are you okay, Brainy?"

"Sure. It's just my clothes – I'll be back in a dash." And I took off running in the direction of home. I could hear Phoebe instructing Helga and Arnold to place the reeds into the solution she'd prepared and to keep them perfectly vertical in the solution for half an hour. I grinned to myself as I knew what would happen next. Within five minutes, Phoebe would suddenly "remember" some very crucial notes she'd left at her house and be forced to run back, and Gerald, being the protective boyfriend, would not let her walk home in the dark alone. So they would leave together, leaving Arnold and Helga with nothing to do but to talk to each other for thirty minutes. If Helga would let her guard down, this could finally be the breakthrough we _all_ had been waiting for.

I did run home and rinse out my clothes. They weren't my best, but I'd have the wrath of the mother upon me if I have mudstains in one of my best shirts. Then I quickly changed and ran back to the park. I got back to the tree near the pond where Gerald and Phoebe were watching. "How's it going? Has it defrosted yet?"

Phoebe turned to me, a twinkle in her eyes. "Oh, I think so. They were pretty quiet for about five minutes, but they've been like this ever since." Their laughter could be heard traveling the light breeze.

I grinned. "But what about your notes?"

Gerald held them up, laughing. "Of course. Phoebe just hid them behind the tree." He sobered a little. "Do you think it'll work?"

"I should think so. If not…" I reached up to touch my glasses unconsciously.

"It's back to square one? Not to mention, she'll probably deck you. You think that the nose can still take it?"

"I don't see why not. After all these years, I think it's become indestructible."

He grinned and cuffed me lightly. "Well, for your sake, I hope you don't find out. About time, Phebes?"

She smiled. "Oh, yes. Commence the huffing, puffing, and exhausted apologies. Now!" And so we ran towards them.

Arnold walked her home that night. He didn't kiss her good night, but gave her a long hug filled with promise. I walked up and waved at him. He waved back, mouthing "thank you," and headed for home. I went inside her house so that we could talk and pushed through her door. She was standing in the middle of the room, blissfully oblivious to my presence. "He loves me. He loves me. He loves ME!"

"Helga?"

"Brainy!" She whirled towards me in a look of complete surprise, and I sensed the fist before I felt it. The last thing I remember thinking was, old habits die hard. And, "well I guess it _is_ indestructible."

When I woke ten minutes later, she was all apologies and gratitude. "I can't decide whether to punch you or kiss you, Brainy. But," she hugged me, "thank you. So much."

That set of broken glasses was the final straw, when Mom finally let me get contacts. Without glasses, I read my college acceptance letter and packed my bags. Without glasses, I received my diploma and watched my friends graduate. And without glasses, I said goodbye to all my friends and promised to keep in touch. Which we did. Plenty of e-mails and online chatting, with the occasional phone call. Including the ecstatic one from Helga a few years later, telling me that they were finally engaged. Which at long last had led to this day.

A hand on my shoulder brought me to myself. "Brainy, is that you?" I looked up into the green-eyed face framed by auburn hair and smiled. "You know it is, Lila."

"I couldn't be sure," she joked, " you've been sitting like a statue for ages. I didn't think you noticed me. May I sit with you?"

"Of course."

"Thanks ever so much." She sat beside me.

"Ever so?" I raised an eyebrow, "You still talk like that?"

"Not often. Old habits die hard; I guess I'm feeling nostalgic." She smiled, "As are you, I bet. You probably didn't even notice all the people here now."

The church was now humming with the expectation of all the people sitting in the pews. There was laughter and surprised greetings as old school chums thumped each other on the back. "You're right. I must have been really out of it."

"It's understandable." Her tone and gaze were sympathetic. Long ago, she'd figured out what all the perception of Arnold and Helga could not. But then, she had found Helga out as well. "It's a rough day for you, isn't it?"

"A bit, but not as much as I expected. But, about time, wouldn't you say?"

She laughed, "Oh, definitely."

"Although you did put a bit of a damper on it for a while there."

"I would stick my tongue out at you if I wasn't grown up. You know I didn't mean to. Especially since I let her have the role of Juliet – she did such a lovely job – I tried so hard to get Arnold to lose interest in me. I was so overwhelmingly saccharine back then because I was trying to get him to realize that I wasn't for him. A bit of spice was what he needed. And now he's getting it."

"But you _are_ a sweet person."

"Well, I try to be. But I had to turn it up a little bit so he would get the point. It still took him a good while, though. At least they picked up on it eventually." Music began playing and we turned to see the wedding party processing down the aisle. Her hand took mine and gave it a squeeze. "Are you ready?"

"I think so. As much as I'll ever be."

The bridal march began and we all turned to see the bride began her final steps as a single woman. I felt the smile blooming on my face as I saw her. She was absolutely beautiful, radiant in her happiness. Her eyes glowed, and her golden hair shone beneath her veil. She'd changed so much, allowing herself to become more graceful and fluid. She still had her "take-no-prisoners" attitude if that glint in her eye was any indication, but she no longer looked like she was fighting against the world. Friendship had changed that. And, of course, Arnold.

I will admit to a pang of jealousy – until I looked at the front of the church and saw Arnold. His face was alight with love and happiness, and he drew himself even higher as he watched his bride walk down the aisle. His smile was threatening to reach both sides of his face – which would be something as his head was still the same football shape, although he had grown into it. Seeing them both so happy made the little monster in my chest turn its head and disappear.

The preacher was saying, "Speak now, or forever hold your peace." This would've been my chance to make a dramatic entrance, sweep the bride off her feet and run off into the sunset. If this was a movie. Or a fairy tale. Or if I was extremely foolish. I felt another squeeze from Lila and smiled at her gratefully. And then the two shared their first kiss as husband and wife, and did so rather thoroughly. As we stood and applauded, Lila turned to me and whispered, "Sure you're all right?"

"Yes. Never better, actually." And surprisingly, I really meant it.

···

I wasn't able to stay long at the reception, I had a long drive back home and I had an appointment early the next morning. Soon after the cake was cut, I made my way over to the happy couple. Gerald and Phoebe were there, as befitted the best man and the maid of honor, and Phoebe was excitedly showing her engagement ring.

"Brainy!" Helga came over and hugged me. "Did you enjoy the ceremony? How about the food? Was it good? What about the cake - ?"

"Helga!" Arnold laughed, "Let the man have time to speak."

I grinned. "Well, in order: Yes, it's good, already answered that, and marvelous. Congratulations to you both – for _finally_ tying the knot! I'm so happy for you. But, I have to be on my way – work and all that."

"Must you go? After all the work you, Gerald, and Phoebe put in, this should be your celebration too."

"I'm afraid so, Helga. But call me when you get back, and we can have a good ol' get-together, just the five of us. Or the whole gang, maybe."

"Or both." She gave me a kiss on the cheek. "Thank you. And drive safely."

"You too." I hugged the two women, pumped both the men's hands and left the room. I was about to turn my key in my car door when I heard "Wait!"

Arnold was running after me, paying little care to the damage it was probably causing his shoes. He came to a stop and panted for breath, "Hold on, Brainy."

"What is it?"

"I just wanted to thank you again."

"For the setup all those years ago? Again?" I laughed. "But that was as much Phoebe and Gerald as it was me."

"Not just for that, although I am grateful. I just wanted to say thank you for the sacrifices you've made." I looked into his face and realized with a jolt that perhaps Lila wasn't the only one who knew about my feelings for Helga. "I can never thank you enough."

"You're welcome. You make each other happy, and that's what I want. Now, you better take good care of her."

He laughed. "Well, you know Helga. She likes to take care of herself. But as much as she lets me, I will. I promise."

We hugged each other. "You better call me when you get back! Don't forget."

"I won't. And even if I suffer amnesia, Helga won't forget. Take care."

"You too."

I waved goodbye, got into the car, and started the engine. Arnold ran back to the reception and I sat in thought. Helga was my first love, and she was finally truly happy. A mist of tears blurred my eyes, but I smiled; I was happy too. I had loved her, but now it was time to close the chapter on that love and to move on. I didn't know what the future would hold – perhaps another love? I blushed when I thought of Lila holding my hand, and when we parted and promised to keep up with each other.

She'd asked, "Are you ready?"

I put the car into drive and pulled out of the parking lot.

"Yes, I am."

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A/N: I hope you liked it! I'd like to think that Helga mellows out a little bit as she gets older and gets the love she deserves - although she still can kick butt when needed. I've always liked Brainy, and I want to think he gets his own happy-ever-after, however it may come.  
And now, just press that button at the bottom and review! You know you waaaant to! Thanks for reading!


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